sometimes…

sometimes I sit and wrestle with my thoughts
wondering who I really am
a bundle of emotions and broken pieces of soul
a dichotomy on two legs
a man of power and abilities
a child of pain and agony
someone who sees what is
and tries to bring what might be
ache is my birthright
joy shall be my legacy
but what of me
what of my life
tempest tossed on life’s riptide
raging at my own inadequacies
my own emotional impotence
when will it be my time
when can I rest when can I find
my surcease my peace
to rest my head
on a loving breast
to rest my heart and soul
driven by need
my own and others
seeing the underside of the bus too often
my time is coming
my life’s fulfillment
weary cannot begin
to describe the state of my soul
emotional awareness of ten thousand life times
weighs heavily upon me
forward is a direction
the only one I know
to drift back in awareness
is madness lurking in the wings
soon soon I hear the sound of drums
callinig me to rest
on the shores of blue tanelorn
to let someone else take up
the mantle of champion
but it will be me in different incarnation
my leave will be short
once again into the breech
to pass once more in review of the One
just wishing just hoping
for a job well done

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